Your lovely fiancée has chosen her 'maids, and now you're stuck with the task of finding just the right number of family and friends to pair them with. How do you decide who makes the cut?

The Usual Suspects

Remember: No matter what your family or friends say, there aren't people who "must" be in the wedding party. Select buddies you're close with-not guys you feel obligated to ask. If you're unfamiliar with wedding etiquette, however, here are the "usual" rules for including groomsmen in your wedding party.

Brothers-yours and your bride's-come first. Unless there are strange circumstances (if you don't speak to your brother, for instance), your brothers and her brothers are automatically in the wedding party. Next come your closest friends (some may be relatives) who are responsible-and let's get real here-financially sound. Being in a wedding, especially if travel is involved, is expensive.

The Best Man for the Job

We'd like to advise you to ignore anyone who offers input on choosing your best man, but we know this isn't entirely realistic. We will say, however, that you'll want to choose the male who is closest to you and has been there for you. Whether he's a blood relative or close friend, you'll be glad when your wedding day arrives that you picked your best friend.

Great Expectations

When you begin asking your friends to stand up in your wedding, be sure to explain what's expected. The basics include:

• Travel and accommodations
• Attend the rehearsal and dinner
• Renting tuxedo and shoes
• Attend tuxedo fittings
• Help plan and attend the bachelor party
• Seat guests at the wedding
• Walk down the aisle with a bridesmaid (maybe)
• Dance with same bridesmaid
• Wedding gift (unspoken requirement, of course!)

If this is manageable for your buds, you're in business.

Who Doesn't Make It

Keep in mind that a lot of money (whether it's yours is inconsequential) and effort are being spent on the biggest day of your life. You don't want to start your lifetime commitment with the following burdens (trust me, I'm a wife): friends who get too drunk, who are late for everything, and who have a reputation for not showing up for important events. These guys are not the best choice for groomsmen. If there's any doubt about whether your skiing buddy, "GanjaDaddy," will fulfill his duties, you probably shouldn't ask him. We suggest, based on horror stories we've heard and witnessed, that you choose your most responsible friends for this very special day.

This doesn't mean you load your wedding party with a bunch of stiffs. You know what we're saying. Keep it reasonable.

About the Author

Jennifer Baumann is editor of Wedding Gazette, the resource for real-world wedding planning that's packed with info on how to plan your budget, how to avoid killing certain family members, exhaustive theme ideas, plus tons of resources on finding favors, necessary accessories, gifts for your groomsmen, and much more.

http://www.weddinggazette.com

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/

Have you ever had to give a wedding speech? As the groom or best man?

Do you remember that feeling? A knot in the stomach, sweaty palms and a panic attack!

Not a very pleasant experience. And yet, I'm sure your wedding speech has the potential to be a great success because 90 % of a typical audience want the speaker to succeed.

Yet according to the Book of Lists, speaking in public is one of our greatest fears.

Much of this anxiety is due to a lack of confidence in writing and preparing a speech rather than in the delivery.

What are the secrets of giving a great wedding speech?

Here are 10 tips for giving a great wedding speech:

1. Have a plan and set some objectives outcomes. There is nothing worse than not knowing what you want to achieve. Do you want to be funny, thank the caterers or touch the emotions of your guests? Before anything work out what you want to achieve.

2. Have a formal structure - beginning, middle and end. Audiences love structure and the best speeches stick to this tried and true rule. Have a welcome (especially acknowledging those who have travelled a long way to be at the wedding), have three personal stories (eg how you met your wife) in the middle and an end (eg thanking and toasting the bridesmaids).

For Example:

· Greeting/Welcome (acknowledge special guests)

· Personal Story #1 ­ how we met

· Personal Story #2 ­ most memorable moment together and why

· Personal Story #3 ­ funny habits and why I love her

· Something nice about the future

· Call to action: Toast Bridesmaids

3. Avoid having too much to say. Hands up those that are guilty of this sin. I know I am. Keep your speech short at a wedding, between 5 and 7 minutes.

4. Keep it Positive. Keep the content of your speech positive, avoid negative comments about previous wives or girlfriends or other 'black sheep' family members. Remember it is a celebration.

5. Research your speech using personal stories. Personal stories help connect with an audience. From your deep well of life reflect on three events that demonstrate how much your care for and love your wife.

6. Keep the personal stories short. Keep these very short and use them to demonstrate a point. Try and take people to that moment in time by describing the place, situation and even what time of day and what the weather was like. Paint the picture and take people back to that moment.

7. Have a strong opening and closing. People remember the opening - first impressions count! The closing is important as it should reinforce the key message you want the audience to go away with in their head after they have heard the presentation. Ending with a 'call to action' can be a powerful way to get your audience to act on your message. In the wedding speech the call to action is easy, ask people to stand, then charge their glasses and toast the bridesmaids.

8. Avoid alcohol until after the speech. You need to be on the ball. Save the celebrations until after your speech.

9. Keep eye contact and use simple notes. Use hand cards with key points. Avoid reading a speech and keep eye contact with your audience.

10.Practice and Rehearse. Practice the speech or at least get some feedback from someone you trust. Recording and listening back to a presentation is the fastest way to improve your skills.

Thomas Murrell, MBA is an international business speaker, marketing consultant and award-winning broadcaster. To receive your free online media, marketing and management newsletter Media Motivators sign up at http://www.8mmedia.com/ . Thomas can be contacted directly at (08) 9388 6888. Visit Tom's blog at http://www.8mmedia.blogspot.com/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/